A Tale of Two Cities (and Four Dispensaries)
In a world where the grass is always greener on the other side, NOXX & Cookies has taken it upon themselves to ensure that East Peoria, IL, has the greenest grass of all. This cannabis dispensary has become the talk of the town, and not just because of its ability to make you talk to the town’s statues.
The NOXX Empire Expands
What started as a humble idea in Grand Rapids, Michigan, has now blossomed into a full-fledged cannabusiness empire. With three locations in Grand Rapids (NOXX 28TH STREET, NOXX PLAINFIELD AVE., and COOKIES GRAND RAPIDS) and one in East Peoria, IL, NOXX & Cookies is spreading faster than the munchies at a midnight snack convention.
East Peoria: The Final Frontier
When NOXX & Cookies decided to venture into Illinois, they chose East Peoria as their new home. Why? Well, rumor has it that they misheard “East Peoria” as “Yeast Peoria” and thought they were opening a bakery. By the time they realized their mistake, the lease was signed, and the rest is history.
The Great Cookie Caper
Speaking of cookies, let’s address the elephant in the room (or should we say, the cookie in the jar?). Despite its name, NOXX & Cookies does not actually sell cookies. This has led to numerous confused grandmothers entering the store in search of snickerdoodles, only to leave with a very different kind of baked good.
Top 3 Reasons Why NOXX & Cookies Doesn’t Sell Actual Cookies:
- They’re afraid of copyright infringement from the Girl Scouts
- They can’t compete with grandma’s recipe
- They’re saving all the cookies for themselves (we’re onto you, NOXX!)
The NOXX Effect
Since opening its doors in East Peoria, NOXX & Cookies has had some unexpected effects on the local community. The city’s resident squirrels have reportedly become much more relaxed, often seen lounging in hammocks made of oak leaves. Local pizza delivery services have seen a 420% increase in orders, and the town’s “World’s Largest Artificial Christmas Tree” has mysteriously started growing real pine needles.
A High-ly Successful Business Model
Despite the occasional mix-up and confused grandmother, NOXX & Cookies has become East Peoria’s favorite cannabis dispensary. Their success can be attributed to their quality products, excellent customer service, and the fact that they’re the only place in town where you can legally buy something that makes C-SPAN interesting.
So, whether you’re in Grand Rapids or East Peoria, remember that NOXX & Cookies is always there to help you reach new heights. Just don’t forget to bring your own cookies – seriously, they don’t sell any.
